Maureen, Maureen, Maureen, Maureen, Maureen

Do you know what I mean
Do you know what I mean
Do you know what I mean

She calls me up at ten past midnight
'Cause she and some guy just had some big fight
And I say "well maybe he's just not all that bright"
She tells me it's not his brain that she likes

M-M-M-M-M-Maureen
You don't know what you do to me
I know you won't be true to me
The least that you can do for me
Is keep it to yourself
I'm so sorry I don't mean to shout
But really I can do without
The details of your days and nights and your thoughts and dreams
Maureen, Maureen, Maureen, Maureen

I know you think I'm just a friend
But can we please just put an end
To all the graphic imagery that you insist on feeding me
I can't accept I'm not the one
Who's getting to have all the fun
Maybe that's what friends are for
But I just can't take it any more

M-M-M-M-M-Maureen
You don't know what you do to me
I know you won't be true to me
The least that you can do for me
Is keep it to yourself
I'm so sorry I don't mean to shout
But really I can do without
The details of your days and nights and your thoughts and dreams
Can we keep it right
Can we keep it clean
Maureen, Maureen, Maureen, Maureen, Maureen

"California Sex Lawyer"

I'm going coast to coast
I'm going nation-wide
I've got my hand on the trigger
Got my girl by my side
I've got the looks that kill
I've got a license to love
I've got a german shepard
And his name is Doug

I'm heading for the sun
I'm gunna become

A California sex lawyer, oh yeah
A California sex lawyer, oh yeah
A California sex lawyer, oh yeah

Well it's not fair, but baby I dont care

I've got big ideas
I've got back up plans
I've got the cha-cha-charisma
Got the slight of hand
I'm gunna do some damage
Gunna bust some heads
I'm gunna go the distance
Then I'm going to bed

I'm heading for the sun
I'm gunna become

A California sex lawyer, oh yeah
A California sex lawyer, oh yeah
A California sex lawyer, oh yeah

Well it's not fair, but baby I dont care

I'm heading for the sun
I'm gunna become

A California sex lawyer, oh yeah
A California sex lawyer, oh yeah
A California sex lawyer, oh yeah
Well It's not fair
It's not fair
it's not fair, but baby I dont care

"Janice's Party"

Bah bah bah bah bah da da da da
Bah bah bah da da da
Bah bah bah bah bah da da da da
Bah bah bah da da da

Welcome friends to Janice's Party
The kind that others have tried
Smoking is permitted inside

We have faith in Janice's Party
With friends who can not sing

And I can hear the doorbell ring

Well I came this far
Now I know that I won't sleep well tonite
Drunk out of my mind
Janice's party's alright, alright

Bah bah bah bah bah da da da da
Bah bah bah da da da
Bah da da da da da da

Here's a chip a vodka martini
Someone call me a car
I'll be underneath the bar

Well I came this far
Now I know that I won't sleep well tonite
Drunk out of my mind

Janice's party's alright, alright

[break]

Well I came this far
Now I know that I won't sleep well tonite
Drunk out of my mind
Janice's party's alright, alright

"Karpet King"

Gold sun-glasses and a wandering eye
He looks like he's wearing a cheap disguise
But it's real
Don't you know how it feels

He goes to work and he scares the hell
Out of all the girls down in Oradell
What a deal
Don't you know how it feels

Lay it down, lay it down
You've got to cover a lot of ground
Lay it down, lay it down
Karpet King

Karpet King

Half a drink and he's out of his head
He puts the boys back into their beds
And he's free
That's the way it should be

Out every night with the girl of his dreams
He knows it'll never be quite what it seems
To be
Don't you want hell to be

Lay it down, lay it down
You've got to cover a lot of ground
Lay it down, lay it down

Karpet King

Lay it down, lay it down, lay it down
Lay it down, lay it down, lay it down
Lay it down, lay it down, lay it down

Lay it down, lay it down, lay it down
Lay it down, lay it down, lay it down
Lay it down, lay it down, lay it down

[repeat and fade]