As I am

Still
Running uphill
Swimming against the current
I wish I weren't so
Fucked
Feels like I'm stuck
Lost in a sea of mediocrity

''Slow down,
You're thinking too much
Where is your soul?''
You cannot touch
The way I
Play
Or tell me what to say
You're in the way

Of all that I believe in

Takin' in the view from the outside
Feeling like the underdog
Watching through the window I'm on the outside
Living like the underdog
I've been wasting my breath on you
Open minds will descend upon you

To those who understand, I extend my hand
To the doubtful I demand, take me as I am
Not under your command, I know where I stand
I won't change to fit your plan, take me as I am

2. This Dying Soul

Hello, Mirror - so glad to see you my friend, it's been a while
Searching, Fearless - where do I begin to heal this wound of self-denial

Face yourself man!
Brace yourself and trace your hell back

You've been blinded, living lie a one way cold existence all the while
Now it's time to stare the problem right between the eyes you long lost child

I wanna feel your body breaking
Wanna feel your body breaking and shaking and left in the cold
I want to heal your conscience making a change o fix this dying soul

Born into this world a broken home
Surrounded by love yet all alone
Forced into a life that's split in two

A mother and a father both pulling you

Then you had to deal with loss and death
Everybody thinking they know best
Coping with this shit at such an age
Can only fill a kid with pain and rage

Family disease pumped through your blood
Never had the chance you thought you could
Running all the while with no escape
Turning all that pain in to blame and hate

Living on your own by twenty one
Not a single care and having fun
Consuming all the life in front of you

Burning out the fuse and smoking the residue

Possessive obsessions selfish childish games
Vengeful resentments
Passing all the blame
Living out a life of decadence
Acing without thought of consequence
Spreading all your lies from coast to coast
While spitting on the ones that matter most

Running power mad with no control
Fighting for the credit they once stole
No one can ever tell you what to do

Ruling other's lives while the can't stand the thought of you

A living reflection seen from miles away
A hopeless affliction having run astray

I wanna feel your body breaking
Wanna feel your body breaking and shaking and left in the cold
I want to heal your conscience making a change o fix this dying soul

Now that you can see all you have done
It's time to take that step into the kingdom
All your sins will only make you strong
And help you break right through the prison wall

Come to me my friend (Listen to me)
I'll help this torture end (Help to set me free)
Let your ego go (I can't carry this load)
You can't go through this alone (I feel so hopeless and exposed)
You'll find your peace of mind (Give me some direction)
You can no longer hide (Break out of this isolation)
Let humility (Openness, honesty)

And become what you can be (A healing tranquility)

Help me
Save me
Heal me
I can't break out of this prison all alone

These tormenting ghosts of yesterday
Will vanish when exposed
You can't hold onto your secrets
They'll only send you back alone

Your fearless admissions
Will help expel your destructive obsessions
With my help I know you can

3. Beyond This Life

"Murder, young girl killed
Desperate shooting at Echoe`s hill
Dreadful ending, killer died
Evidently suicide"

A witness heard a horrifying sound
He ran to find a woman dead and
Lying on the ground

Standing by her was a man
Nervous, shaking, gun in hand
Witness says he tried to help

But he`d turned the weapon on himself

His body fell across that poor young girl
After shooting out in vain
The witness ran to call for assistance
A sad close to a broken love affair

Our deeds have traveled far
What we have been is what we are

She wanted love forever
But he had another plan
He fell into an evil way
She had to let him down
She said "I can`t love a wayward man"

She may have found a reason to forgive
If he had only tried to change
Was their fatal meeting prearranged?

Had a violent struggle taken place?
There was every sign that lead there
Witness found a switchblade on the ground
Was the victim unaware?
They continued to investigate
They found a note in the killer`s pocket
It could have been a suicide letter

Maybe he had lost her love

I feel there`s only one thing left to do
I`d sooner take my life away
than live without losing you

Our deeds have traveled far
What we have been is what we are

All that we learn this time
(What we have been is what we are)
Is carried beyond this life