DIRTY (GRUVIS MALT 05) 

[Sage Francis]
I am..
More than two faced, I've got at least six with cheap
tricks
To hide my not-so-pretty side while accentuating cheeks
and lips
I use battin' rouge to battle crews who don't like the
remix
And you just act confused by the way I choose to fuck
with a double helix
Cuddle with me quick, get befuddled and sea sick
My ugly mug'll be equipped to make it a struggle to see
shit
The beat kicks, my belly feels empty I want a person
there
I'll curse and swear, and act unmother-like until I
persevere
Haven't been to church in years, right now that's the
setting
I couldn't think of a better place to cover my face and
have a wedding
It's upsetting how plastic my mask is getting
It's melting and releasing toxic fumes
Covered by lots of perfume, never coming out of my
closet of costumes
Cartoon versions of myself get drawn out
After that occurs, time gets consumed
I'm in the dressing room with the caricatures
Until my head is cured I'm heading for pedicures and
manicures
Man, if your not damn sure of whether or not
to pop the question I'll let you in on the answer..
Think of sex in a camper...
A phony life with a trophy wife, menthol cigarettes and
cancer

Smoke and Mirrors

So sophisticated

So cool

I AM..
An illusion specialist turning tricks who could never
diss
The one the wake up next to even if it's not the one
they went to bed with
Breakfast at Tiffany's, skip lunch, make sure the
dinner table is candle lit
I squish my feet until they crunch, but I'm unable to
make these sandals fit
I can't just sit I need to MOVE and power walk, because
Oprah said it
And I won't forget it, she does it during the opening
credits
I'm so synthetic
I like the smell of coke, get it? I powder my nose
Power to hoes who pound on a hose while playing in a
pound of snow
I'm getting snow plowed, I KNOW
It's time to fuck a guy now
I just applied blush and look surprised
but it's the way I plucked my eyebrows
Time out, I'm in a tanning booth... reading Danielle
Steel
And I'm planting banana peels beneath every damn man's
heel
Waiting for them to fall for my sad trick I stop, drop
and kneel
With a little touch of magic, I'll let David cop a feel
I'm not real, but I've got FEELINGS...
except in my nipples because of the breast implants
To have my chest enhanced I pant in dresses but never
dress in pants
A club hopping strobe light honey...addicted to wrinkle
cream
Sipping on Listerine, Mr. Clean don't like the smell of
nicotine

Smoke and Mirrors

So sophisticated

So cool

I AM..
Dirtyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

DIRTY MAC 

Your girl's been spending lots of time at my place
I been helpin her remove the makeup from her fine face
Telling her to go "Au Natural"
And she trust me cause I'm your pal, thats my style
(Vrooom) I drive the Dirty Mac truck
Convincing her to drink that whole 30 rack up
I sit until I think your girly's mad drunk, then I turn
the dirty mac up
What you and her, we shacked up
Well that sucks, we been getting close lately
Special time adds up so don't hate me
It's all about bologna draperies, beef sticks, and meat
curtains
Monthly afternoons of bloody hatchet wounds and grease
purses
I'm the salt in her pepper, the hop in her steppa
The broccoli in her mi-douth, but she don't want no
chedda
(She don't want no chedda?) Naw she want somethin betta
I'd like to thank you homes you the reason why I met her
Who's cryin?

EMBARRASSED 

[Intro - Slug]
Look at me for a second
No, seriously, look at me
Honestly, ask yourself this
Lookin at me, do you really think that there is any way
possible for you to embarrass me?
Look at me! Do you really think I care what you think?
Do you really think I care what you say?
Look at me!

[Hook - All]
I'm embarrased by my past actions and even more ashamed
Of my present thoughts and future endeavors to clear my
name (x2)

(x2)I'm embarrassed, I'm embarrassing, I'm an
embarrassment, and it's all addin' up

[Verse 1 - Sage Francis]
I'm so preoccupied with self indulgency to see
What you provided me, I fully appreciate your offerings
And the awful things in are lessened
By lessons of self-acceptance I want blessings
And I regret keeping a distance
For future reference over bridges are preventable, I
know the traps
Humanity as a whole will collapse, now close the gaps
We dwell on what we share, and what separates us
We're all different, but what makes us a unit?
Music is a universal language; so is anguish, pain, and
torment
Balance of emotions, it shows a happiness upon us
No more pickin' sides, one without the other is
impossible
(Uhh, forgot what I was supposed to say)
They call it bi-polar, unstable conditions, they got me
lookin' over my shoulder
The book that I wrote ya', was meant to move the time
slower
But it was spent cookin' my mind's motor, now I'm older

[Hook] x 2

[Verse 2 - Eyedea]
Yeah, it was in the cards that I'm to be forever
haunted
Hip hop is slowly but surely becoming the Big Brother
I never wanted homie to hurt me, purely to mic
Still my head is astonished with Sonics and Stetics
Poetics and knowledge and polished rhetoric
Everything has its negative
Conscience consciously edit
Constantly get rid of the rigorous repetitive movements
Been better than you since...
It's easier to talk to you about it than to do it
Here I am, center of the spotlight
They all drunk and smilin', waiting for their cockfight
"Time to entertain" says the clock of life
So I became the freaky kid I'm starin' at, even though
you know it's not right
Embarrassment, it's in between insecurity and arrogance
I'm a machine with a clarity I can barely grip
So if I seem red in the face, it's not 'cause I feel
out of place
It's just that

[Hook] x 2

["Breakdown" x2 - Slug]
And I can yell all day, all night, all day
And I still doubt that you would hear a word I say
And I can drive all night, all day, all night
But if you stay with me, you'll never get it right

[Verse 3 - Slug]
I was never much for the self-driven skepticism
I was that cat that let distraction affect my vision
You were the kitten that was screaming to
Cover up the sound of landing or crashing, however it
was going down,
But it's goin' down and it's goin' fast
And I have no doubts about whether or not it's gonna
last
Fill the glass, tilt your head back
Let it trickle through the throat to where you hide
your giggles and your laughs
I'll wait to find the correct departure time
Shine my eyes to keep the lies from climbin' up inside
my mind
Some belong to you, and some belong to me,
But none of them can escape the contemplation necessary
You can't scare me, but you can keep it buried
Put your hands on the circle; try to steer me
And now that I sing all of my songs worth singing,
I'm guessing that it's just a test to see how strong I
can bring it.

EVERY MIDNIGHT 

Every midnight we sit at the coffee table and we share
a cup of tea
He stays up with me and we discuss things
Most of the time he just listens
Other times offers suggestions or he just ignores my
questions
It gets more depressing as time passes, because every
night
I ask this one question and all he does is wipe his
glasses
It's aggrevating as hell and I'm just waiting to tell
whether or not he can even remember the answer..
Or whether or not he's choosing not to tamper with his
memory..
Or whether or not he can even fucking remember me.
What a waste of time
But every night it's that same damn routine:
One green cup of tea and me stuck all by myself once
its empty
Then I'm off to bed with plenty of caffiene to keep me
up and thinking
The cup I'm drinking from is never clean
I can't remember if it's a dream once I awake and I
walk..
From my messy bed and anticipate the next late night
talk

Every midnight we sit at the coffee table and we share
a cup of tea
He stays up with me and we discuss things
Most of the time he just listens
Other times offers suggestions with his awful
expressions
Altered refelctions...his whole aura is see-through
With more confessions...I don't want to leave you
"This cup should be bottomless!"...as my insecurities
spill
I see his face fading away. I surely need a refill
I purposely keep still and don't move much
Except to wet my lips with sips. With every kiss of
death I lose touch
I sip the tea carefully because its at the degree of
seperation
Tasting the forked tongue in bi-lingual conversation
Waiting for his answer still...and at any given chance
I will
Sweet and Low my bitter past...let the cancer kill the
small talk
"Alright, man...this bitter taste in my mouth needs to
get washed out
Ghosts in this house don't have anything timely to talk
about."
The concept is dead. There's nothing death should
interrupt
I went to bed last night with one sip left in the cup

EYE OF THE TIGER 

Risin' up, back on the street
Did my time, took my chances
Went the distance now I'm back on my feet
Just a man and his will to survive
So many times it happens too fast
You trade your passion for glory
Don't lose your grip on the dreams of the past
You must fight just to keep them alive

It's the eye of the tiger
IT'S THE THRILL OF THE FIGHT
Rising up to the challenge of our rival
And the last known survivor
Stalks his prey in the night
And he's watching us all
With the eye of the tiger

Face to face, out in the heat
Hangin' tough, stayin' hungry
They stack the odds still we take to the street
For the kill, with the skill to survive

It's the eye of the tiger
IT'S THE THRILL OF THE FIGHT
Rising up to the challenge of our rival
And the last known survivor
Stalks his prey in the night
And he's watching us all
With the eye of the tiger

Risin' up, straight to the top
Had the guts, got the glory
Went the distance, now I'm not gonna stop
Just a man and his will to survive
It's the eye of the tiger
It's the thrill of the fight
Rising up to the challenge of our rival
And the last known survivor
Stalks his prey in the night
And he's watching us all
With the eye of the tiger
The eye of the tiger
The eye of the tiger
The eye of the tiger
The eye of the tiger

GOING BACK TO REHAB 

I'm going there to give 'em cash, hear 'em laugh bring
'em back
If i cant tear down these walls I'll slip 'em through
the cracks
If that crack ain't big enough, I'm sick enough to get
committed
Where he's been I ain't been allowed to visit, and I
miss him
They put me in a submission hold, got him living in a
hole
Give me the rope, pull it back, cut him slack he's
getting old
This cold does nothing for his bones, he's shaking
Always put on hold that prison phone's always taken
They put me on a speaker but my voice is breaking up
I'd like to think he caught bits and pieces before the
gates got shut
RAISE IT UP
Somebody cover me, I'm going in
With razor cuts, and something ugly that I know within
Can't afford the luxury of exposing everything
But I've been doing the best that I can
I take it day by day, just one step at a time
And I don't need a sobriety test to walk the line
Walking on this tightrope with arms open wide
hoping to find you live and well on the other side
So I could give you this gift as a symbol
When I felt the rope loosen, I knew i missed my window
He really did love you, you know.. pat pat..
I said 'Get your fucking hand off my back
This is my passage into adulthood and I need not
Small talk fingers fishing from a weak spot
I used to dream alot, in search for meaning in a
sleepwalk
The only time I find myself having a deep talk
But now I never sleep 'cause sleep is the cousin of
death
One can never rest depending on how up the drugs get
Upset, submit me to a bloodtest
Find no trace of my words reverting back to...wait,
that wasnt what I meant
My right eye is sunrise, the left is sunset
The moonshine ain't got me drunk yet
My tongue's wet for the lunar eclipse
And when youre flat broke ain't nothing you wont do for
a fix
It's a beautiful mix of Jesus-Juice from my lips
And words that are stuck so I stirred 'em up with a
crucifix
And this is where I found a friend in Christ
I also found a few spikes and I decided to use them as
pegs on my bike
So you could have a place to stand when I broke you out
of that vice
And now im going back to rehab
I'm going back to rehab, back to back
Going back to rehab, I don't drink though
I'm going back as a dead again Christian
With a medicine prescription
Yeah I'm a friend of Bill, let, let, let me in
Get me outta this
Hooked up to plugs and wires while dogs sniff for a
powdered substance
In a town of judgements with glass house development
Cookie-cutter Republican school-book intelligence
They aint never considered how just one rock
Could crack the whole facade now they confiscate
slingshots
I will not meditate on the sermon
Heaven's gate is burning so we self-medicate with
bourbon
While their collection plate gets turned into a purse
I've turned into a second rate person, but I'm not the
first
This isnt your typical cry for help
I tried to melt, but someone stopped the trickling with
a bible belt
Reminded me of tourniquets and heroin nods
Now that, that right there, that's one hell of a God
You cant match magic with an addict thats got a mapping
compass
In order to find a substance and matchstick that
functions
A searching and fearless immoral inventory
'Til every person with a story begins to bore me
I did what i had to do to get
To the place where your face wasnt such a blurry mess
I took all our favorite promises and words that we kept
You werent hard to find, all it took was 13 steps

GOOD FASHION 

Dark lenses, tint the windows that are under my eyelids
To hide from the light like I'm stuck in a fire pit
Burning up a sigh, with no desire to live through these
lies
So I suffer in silence
Culture of violence, truth stuck behind my lips
Bound, gagged, and whipped, stripped, divided and split
Eatin' words with a forked tounge
And now the grumble of my stomache's got the thump of a
war drum
A battle goin' on inside, nobody's safe from
Clowns are playing rush and roulette with paint guns
They run in place, and they call it the human race
Losin' pace with that stupid look on their face,
shootin' blanks
And all they ask is why I wear these glasses
And all I can tell them is hell, it's good fashion
All they ask is why I wear these glasses
And all I can tell them is, hell...
We're acting like men of steel, with a thin protective
shield
Gathering the raw footage that can never make the final
reel
So we cover up the stories that eyes tell, make way for
what we take to the grave
It doesn't bind both souls, buried in a ? bargain bin
In the cemetary there's a joust between God and men
Talkin' loud, but aint sayin' nothin, used to have
daily discussions, I doubt we'll ever talk again
And all they ask is why I wear these glasses
And all I can tell them is hell, it's good fashion
All they ask is why I wear these glasses
And all I can tell them is, hell...

GOT UP THIS MORNING 

Sage:
It's not that what we're doing is wrong
But let's try to keep this a secret
Between me, you, and the song
A menage a trois that sings to me
Sinfully
When god plays along

Jolie Holland:
What you want with a woman who won't do what you say?

Sage:
I was sweet on her
She was sweet on Jesus
We slept with a blanket barrier between us
Master of her craft, I had her laughin like hyenas
When I asked her if she'd marry an elitist
Staggering genius in lace
With the grace of a drunken monk
The mask isn't seamless cause her face says something's
up
But I don't dare ask her I just listen
Switchin to my good ear and adjusting my position
As she discusses Ginsberg I listened and learned
As she dispersed his words I just resisted the urge to
do like he would
Whatever he wanted, if she allowed me to
She dangled that carrot then asked me:
"What would Bukowski do?"
Oh don't go there
He'd make you his mom and then completely lie about it
in a book later on

Jolie Holland:
Got up this morning
Didn't know right from wrong

Sage:
Spirits were lifted when she whispered something French
in my ear
Tension was there
When I responded in English it sounded less sincere
The sex in the air couldn't be left alone
So welcome to the Terrordome
A bedroom full of pheromones
Where nothing that we say is set in stone
If I thought it was for posterity I'd already be
writing better poems
But I'm talking in extremes
Best this and best that
Best not regret anything that ever gets said to this
hell cat
Creepin on all fours
Ready for combat
With secretive wars sneaking her claws in our contract
Bending every which way but loose with no proof that
anything that we've suggested to this day is the whole
truth

Jolie Holland:
Got up this morning
Didn't know right from wrong

Sage:
I heard her chemical romance was a medical slowdance
Said my advance was sexual
Held my genitals with cold hands
Set up the Coke cans
Broke out the Red Ryder
Then one by one I tried to knock down everything that's
dead inside her
She used to treat street dividers like a balance beam
Arms spread wider than the legs in her dad's magazine
Re-enacting the pages that she got trapped between
I used it for kindling and then spilled the gasoline
Now I'm your water boy
I fetch it from your cheeks just like tennis balls
Smell the stench of your weakness on the bedroom walls
Somebody careless let em vaporize
"Who let these fall to the floor from your poor vacant
eyes?"
Disintegrate
This ain't a great first impression
But I work better on pages, they say words are my
profession
Let me spell it out in simple language
Plain English
I want your suicide to be a book of mine that I never
finish

Jolie Holland:
Got up this morning
Didn't know right from wrong

What you want with a woman who won't do what you say?

HAUNTED HOUSE PARTY 

The first thing he says to me
"If you could know it all would you want to?"
and I'm wondering if it's a question he poses everybody with
I was warned about the gift that he's got and the kind of things he sees
Me? . . . well I got a few tricks up my sleeve
I was waitin' for him to show his hand
til I discovered the difference between an old mind and the mind of an old man
so I stand corrected, sitting in my chair erect and attentive
wishing that he never asked that question
'cause it echoes in my empty feelings
fearing what's underneath each following sentence
revealing a puzzle piece to the jig saw
of a skin crawling coffee session
It's something that his kid saw in me
that brought me to his attention
and he knows this
who's he think he's speakin' to
it's not often that he emerges from his coffin of a reading room
on a special occasion he tests his relationship
with one who's never read much but he's interested in spaceships
his head's stuffed with ancient scripts so he laughs
holds up his golden cup to toast the past
here's to a lack of spontaneity the future has
I can tell you when you're gonna die
all you gotta do is ask

(what's up power trip? big tough guy now? throwing things like that over a cup of joe w/ someone you don't even know, really, you don't know who i am)

he sat there, his eyes still weren't focusing
he said' "i can see you seeing some things"
and i said "yeah, well thanks for noticing. What gave it away - my poker limbs?
Cross examined while my hands were busy closing things up into deserts
that he's only read about in winter weather
and i'm able to fill the gaps that act as traps in the lyrics of letters
when mirrors open i bet he thinks i'll enter
but i detect ulterior motives in his hidden agenda
we live forever in these chairs comparing mental notes
bodies doubling as temporary captains of a rented boat

My paper mate sent me to her folks in an envelope
disguised as insurance fraud, some things were never meant to float
i've never been in a shipwreck but i know they exist
and the experience must be something close to this
hopeless feeling that gets reeled in from oceans for emotions
sick
got me shaking his hand with an open fist
what's he notice of my grasp besides the calluses
a soul that's trapped by my mind's paralyses
knowing i'll ask his to sign the marriage slip
he says "not so fast"
and he goes to find his glasses (bastard)
puts on the lenses that were scratched
like someone got the best of him in a cat fight
must have been when he developed that bad sight
they don't help, he needs a helmut with a flash light
if he thinks he can enter the darkness at half price
to find his daughter's black wedding dress from her past life
traditions died at our haunted house party last night

HELL OF A YEAR 

It's been a hell of a year, but I'm mentally prepared
To do a dance around the next couple medical scares.
I'm Fred Astaire with the metal wearing quickly off my
tap shoes.
So I step quietly, the way that cat's move.
But I'm bear-like. My head trapped in dear lights.
You can call me John, I'm writing letters to the dark
side of the moon tonight.
My lovely Jane, you went away but the pain stayed.
So I'm sending you a package to the address where you
traded names.
I made no claims on the identity theft.
I'm more concerned about the home with no amenities
left.
And it's already a mess. The dust piles like your junk
mail.
So I eat away depression and crush the scale.
You find yourself on the opposite side of the spectrum.
Emaciated on a strict diet of bed crumbs.
Me? I choose to wallow and I'll just swim in my fat.
You...refuse to swallow so I see ribs from the back.
This isn't an attack, it's an admission of guilt.
I'm living in the past, kissing your ass, sipping your
milk.
But it's all bone and curdle. I saw stones in a circle.
Stood in the middle. Told myself riddles in a robe
that's purple.
The murder weapon was an icicle.
Is that the reason why I'm standing in this puddle with
my eyes so full?
I fight feelings like a war on drugs.
I'm a chemist with a test tube addiction born through
coffee mugs.
Our baby now is all growed up.
Your car is still dead in my driveway while I wait for
the tow truck.
And you know what? I know I drove you away,
I still don't think it was wrong so I don't know what
to say.
It's been a tough year. You say that life ain't fair,
Well, guess what, baby...life ain't. Thems the breaks.
You say that life ain't worth it. But it is. You gotta
work it.
Nobody's life is perfect.

Yeah, you've been dealt a bad hand. Placed against a
stacked deck.
Been through all the cat scans and bad checks.
But I slashed your debt. Not your wrists.
And I couldn't help with anything else that became
cancerous.
Halfway people with a full baby to bury,
Took a flame to the papier-mache sanctuary.
When the smoke clears...try not to stare into the
light.
But, also, don't stay in the dark as if that's what
life is like.
It's just a series of unfortunate events,
But the messages we get are more important than death.
What's the rush?
I've got a shortness of breath.
What's the rush?
Running from you...running from me.
It's the rush. The crush. The lust. The love-trust.
So what's the trouble? The busted bubble? The unjust?
That's just the way the cookie crumbles. It does suck,
But suck it up. We're all looking, but nothing's
enough.
We used each other as a crutch. The clutch. The shift
switches.
You couldn't just adjust. You combusted and ripped
pictures.
This is why I'm not considered a saint?
Well, guess what?......I ain't.

It's been a hell of a year.
You said that I ain't there, I ain't care, and life
ain't fair.
It's been a hell of a trip.
You say my mind's unfit, I've been flip, and I ain't
shit.
It's been a hell of a life.
You say that I ain't like the way I write and that
ain't right.
It's been a hell of an attempt.
You say that I ain't meant for promises unkept.
Well, guess what, darlin...
I'm a keep keep callin
Guess what, darlin...
I'm a keep keep callin.