Assumed addendum to all reviews: "This review brought to you by (insert intoxicant here; usually caffeine)" Effective May 2014: Due to my recent promotion and inability to adhere to my former review output, I may now go for extended periods without contributing a review. This no longer means I am either dead, in jail, or without internet access. Please comprehend that those three ultimatums are still inherently possible at any time, however. Effective December 2014: Some reviews will now be cross-posted from The Metal Observer. All applicable entries will be submitted here, leaving a handful of non-metal reviews unique to the former. Search for me there under my real/full name. ...why am I even writing this? Nobody even reads my reviews!