Kada bi svi slushali Dzeka serija bi se zvala 12 umesto 24.

Kiefer Sutherland pije da bi zaboravio sve strashne stvari koje je Jack Bauer uradio.

Jack Bauer je uspeo da pobegne sa ostrva iz serije LOST za 24 sata.

Kada bi Jack Bauer bio u sobi sa Hitlerom, Staljinom, i Ninom Majers i imao pishtolj sa 2 metka, upucao bi Ninu Majers 2 puta.

Jack Bauer je jednom zaboravio gde je spustio kljucheve. Zatim je proveo pola sata mucheci sebe dok nije odao lokaciju kljucheva.

1.6 biliona Kineza su besni na Jack-a. Zvuchi kao fer borba.

Bog je morao da da Jack-u imunitet sheste Bozje zapovesti "ne ubij". Da nije to uradio, Jack bi ga smatrao teroristom, a Bog zna shta jack radi teroristima.

Jedini razlog zbog kog ste pri svesti sada je taj shto Jack Bauer ne zeli da vas nosi.

Dinosaurusi su se smejali Jack-u...

Kazu da ne mozete izdrzati ni jedan dan bez vode, Jack je izdrzao 6 sezona.

Jack spava sa pishtoljem ispod jastuka, ali vas moze ubiti i jastukom.

Jack-u nije potreban prevodilac, muchenje zvuchi isto na svim jezicima.

Jack Bauer nikada ne promashuje. Ako vas nije pogodio to je zato shto je gadjao drugog teroristu 12 milja dalje.

Ako Jack ostane bez municiije, on stoji mirno, primi 3 metka u grudi, i iskoristi ih da napuni pishtolj.

Nostradamus je jednom predvideo u svojim spisima "U 21 veku, chovek zvani Jacques bice...spasitelj sveta". Trenutak kasnije, Jack Bauer mu je zakucao na vrata, upucao Nostradamusa u nogu i pocheo da viche "WHO ARE YOU WORKING FOR?!"

Supermen je nosio Jack-ovu pidzamu.

Jack nema prijatelje. Jer dok je bio mali, kada se igrao policajca i pljachkasha, pljachkashi su svi bili ispitivani i ubijeni.

Jack-ov prijatelj Chase, je jednom rekao da da voli Kim Bauer. Jack je onda ubio gomilu terorista kako bi pokushao da se smiri. Kada su mu ponestali teroristi, Jack je rekao Chase-u da nema izbora i isekao mu je ruku sekirom.

Rat u Iraku ce se zavrshiti kad Jack bude otishao na odmor tamo.

Jack je nashao Bin Ladena, pustio ga i zatim ga nashao ponovo iz dosade.

Da je Jack Bauer gej, zvao bi se Chuk Noris.

Upon hearing that he was played by Kiefer Sutherland, Jack Bauer killed Sutherland. Jack Bauer gets played by no man.

Jack Bauer ne chita knjigu. On je muchi dok ne dobije sve potrebne informacije.

Jack Bauer je u jednom trenutku pobio toliko terorsita, da je 5 najtrazeniji u svetu bio klinac u Maleziji koji je preko interneta skinuo film Dodgeball.

Bogu je trebalo 6 dana da zavrshi svoj posao, Jack je svoj zavrshio za 24 sata.

Svaki put kad ti masturbirash Jack ubije jednog teroristu. Ne zato shto ti masturbirash vec zati shto toliko chesto Jack ubija teroriste.

Jack Bauer je dao ime svojoj machki Chuk Noris. Zashto? Because he's a pussy.

U poslednjih 5 godina, Stiven Sigal je izgubio 10 kg bezeci od Jack-a.

    Ova dva su mocna! Zato si ih posebno naglasio???   

Mada se ne bih slozio! Nemoj da te cuje Chuck Norris

Terrorists dread the day in October that Daylight Savings Time ends. Jack Bauer gets 25 hours in which to kill them.                                                               If everyone listened to Jack Bauer, the show would be called 12.
   Kiefer Sutherland drinks to forget all the terrible things Jack Bauer has done.
   Jack Bauer once won a game of Connect 4 in 3 moves.
   Jack Bauer could get off the Lost island in 24 hours.
   If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he'd shoot Nina twice.
   Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up the location of the keys.
   Jack and Jill went up the hill. Only Jack came down. Jill was a fucking terrorist.
   1.6 billion Chinese are angry with Jack Bauer. Sounds like a fair fight.
   God had to give Jack Bauer immunity on the sixth commandment "Thou shalt not kill". If he hadn't, Jack would've considered God to be a terrorist and God knows what happens to terrorists.

The only reason you're conscious right now is because Jack Bauer doesn't want to carry you.

    
The Dinosaurs laughed at Jack ...
    
Killing Jack Bauer doesn't make him dead. It just makes him angry.
    
There were originally five horsemen of the apocalypse. Jack Bauer said he would travel by foot.
    
They say you can't go a day without water, Jack Bauer has gone five seasons.
    
Don't ask what Jack Bauer would do for a Klondike bar.
    
Jack Bauer sleeps with a gun under the pillow. But he could kill you with the pillow.
    
When Kim Bauer lost her virginity, Jack found it and put it back.
    
Jack Bauer doesn't need a translator, torture sounds the same in every language.
    
When life hands Jack Bauer Lemons, he kills Terrorists. Jack Bauer fuckin' hates lemonade.
    
As a boy, Jack Bauer interrogated his parents on Easter until they revealed the location and contents of each hidden egg.
    
Jack Bauer doesn't miss. If he didn't hit you it's because he was shooting at another terrorist twelve miles away.
    
Every person in authority who has ever decided Jack Bauer is wrong and a loose cannon who needs to be arrested is dead. Coincidence? I think not.
    
After running out of ammo, Jack stood in the line of fire, took 3 shots to the chest, and used them to reload.


Mada mi je ovo trulo.... Ipak je Cak Noris jedan i jedini!! 

cuti cucete cak noris!!!

 

Neka stoji za sada.
U onome momentu kada pocne na veliko da podseca na temi o Norisu ide pod kljuc.

A sve mi se cini da ce to biti veoma brzo 

Ali ovo su uglavnom vicevi koji su vezani za deshavanja iz serije.

Nemo da me nervirash.

A sto, da ne oces da se bijes?
Nemoj da ti posaljem Norisa ima da isprebija i tebe i Bauera   

Kao sto sam rekao OK je dok ne pocnu da se prepisuje fore sa Norisove teme. Onda se zna ... katance 

@Insademan drz' ga ja cu da ga tabam!!! 

ja predlazem da ide pod lock,sve su to ista sranja,druga pakovanja